There has been a church on this yew fringed patch of ground north of the River Thames since at least the 12th century, meaning that today’s congregation continue a tradition of worship that can be traced back nearly 1000 years.

The current chancel dates from the 12th century church but there is archaeological evidence of a pre-Conquest building. In subsequent times the nave has been rebuilt and the floor level raised. At the west end of the nave is a Norman font with decorative designs carved into the stonework around the basin.

The font occupies a central spot beneath an ancient oak gallery which is home to the church organ and, further back even still, sits the massive Tudor tower, the summit of which is the highest point in Dorney.

The south porch, the day to day entrance to the church, is made of ancient red brick and dates to 1661 when it was built to commemorate the birth of Lady Anne Palmer, the child of Barbara Villiers, Countess of Castlemaine and Roger Palmer, Earl of Castlemaine.

Our room was a little warm overnight due to the lovely weather. The breakfast spread was excellent, having both cooked and continental style options, although unfortunately the plates were cold.

When we were comfortably replete we drove to The Savill Garden which is situated in Windsor Great Park. Whilst we were travelling Mr C’s phone started to ring again, luckily, for some unaccountable reason (divine intervention?), the fully charged phone had completely drained its battery leaving us to enjoy the gardens in peace. The summer garden beds were particularly spectacular and we enjoyed walking through the woodlands in the wider garden. Before we left for our next destination we had lunch and browsed the extensive gift shop.

We had planned to visit Dorney Court next but realised that it wouldn’t be open when we arrived so we took a slight detour to see the Magna Carta Memorial at Runnymede. We made the short walk to the memorial which was erected by the American Bar Association in 1957. This area is another plane spotter’s paradise and, as we made our way back to the car park we observed many planes coming into land at Heathrow at approximately one minute intervals.

The hot weather prompted us to purchase a Mr Whippy ice cream before making our way to Dorney Court.

Dorney Court has a fascinating history having been in continuous ownership of the same family since 1537. The house visit is by guided tour and our guide shared many interesting bits of information including pointing out the 17th century priest hole which is rumoured to connect to a secret tunnel running to Burnham Abbey which is about a mile away.

After we had been in one of the rooms for a few minutes our guide mentioned that it was the room where the ghost had appeared. The story goes that whilst a young single man is sleeping in bed a lady dressed in grey appears and points to the corner of the room. Later in the place indicated by the ghost, a skull and other skeletal remains were found behind the wall.

After relating the tale the guide looked at me and said ‘in fact the ghost appeared exactly where you are standing and I see the colours you are dressed in’ (mauve/greys). Thankfully the room (for me) didn’t have an odd or creepy feel to it.

Before joining our guided tour we visited the charming parish Church of St James the Less which is situated just behind the house. The church has lots of interesting features and I would have liked to go back after the tour but unfortunately a wedding was taking place on the lawn blocking access to the church.

That evening we dined in the hotel restaurant which turned out to be a mistake.  The bread plates (but not the bread) were partially removed before our main courses arrived. The meal was disappointing and it was served on cold plates leading to our meal going cold very quickly. After we had finished the plates were removed and then, a little while later the bread was removed from the table. Dessert menus were not offered so after a while Mr C attracted someone’s attention and we were provided with menus but nobody came to take our order.

By this time we had given up on the idea and Mr C went to track someone down and request the bill. When he found someone he said ‘Could I have the bill for the table you have forgotten over there?’ Almost immediately the head waiter came over with the bill, apologising profusely, and advised that he had removed the cost of the meals from the bill and that we would only have to pay for the wine.

The saga of poor service continued in the bar area where the young bar tender was rather rude with an ‘I couldn’t care less’ attitude (Manuel who had served us the previous evening was serving in the restaurant). When mum asked if she could have a coffee he rather abruptly said no and when the next drink she wanted was not available either, no apologies just a curt response.

Chaos and mayhem continued as the bartender shared his this attitude with other customers and members of staff. For one group of customers the right type of glasses could not be found and drinks were not available until a little later they were miraculously unearthed in the cellar. Whilst all this was going on mum advised us that room service had removed her flannel from her room that morning. All very ‘Fawlty Towers’!

By the end of the evening I was trying very hard not to laugh out loud